Can't Get a Stitch in Knitwise

I am trying to be a good little knitter. I am a test knitter you know, oh yeah!- Tal hired me to test knit her vest for her. She did so by paying it forward and doing so many nice things for me and for others that I wanted, no, greatly desired, no, longed, to do something nice for her. You see, Tal is one of those unique individuals who does nice things, and says nice things, and most certainly, thinks nice things, all of the time. I know a few other people like this, my niece Katie, sister Diane and son Ryan to name a few. I gotta figure out what sign these folks are because that must have something to do with it...oh no, that can't be right because Katie's birthday is in April, Ryan's is in February, and Diane's is in January...Tal I think is May, maybe April, it was pretty recently anyway, but I digress. Well, I feel I must digress a bit more to say that I have so many wonderful people in my life who will help me out at the drop of a hat. My mother, my sister Kathy, friends Kathy, Helene, and Genevieve come immediately to mind, and I don't mean to downgrade their philanthropic nature in the least, but they are more like me, realists. The other folks on the list (Ryan, Katie, Tal, Diane) are more than real to me. They're surreal to me in their ability to never judge, or say mean things for fun, or get upset over little things. They are, in a nutshell, completely above all drama and out for the good of the other, sometimes at the expense of themselves. They are romantics, naturalists, expressionists, feminists, humanists. They are enigmas to me, the enlightened ones. Okay, so back to knitting, or rather not knitting. What the heck is up with me lately? I am test knitting a vest for Tal (as I mentioned) and I can hardly get through a few rows a day. I've had a market bag on the needles for months now, not to mention my little shrug/cardi. All I want to do really is admire patters, organize my needles, and dye yarn all kinds of "Kool"-aid colors. I want to talk Knitting math, I want to go to knitting school, I want to design knitted garments, I want to plan knitting projects; but I don't want to knit them. I have to pick myself up by the needles and get a move on. I have to think, "What would Ryan, Katie, Tal and Diane do?" Or, better yet, I have to think, "What would Wendy, Helene, and Maggie do?" whip out my needles and knit like the devil cuz' man I love this craft and like Kat's new button reads "Knitting is Naughty" and if Knitting is naughty, I don't wanna be nice ;)~